Proud Crowd/Pride Cried - Ferron

    I can't call you from this place to hear you say that I'm not your kind
    It's a thin road before us, we're the wake left behind
    It's sad and I fail to see what it had to do with you and me
    But I guess that's like wondering what's a point to a line
    There must be something I wanted more than wanting your love
    'cause you stood in my doorway and I stood in my glove
    Most afraid to follow, a kingdom my stride
    It's so telling what won't live with hunger and pride.

    I thought of you often but I never could tell you
    the 'you' that I cherished, something hurt me so bad
    A few had come close, I couldn't take them in either
    I guess the distance between us was my love never had.
    And though we live separate I keep two rooms open
    One has you in it, the other does not
    And I move in the middle, unsure and protected
    And I trip on my rope, vaguely sensing I'm caught.

    A friend tried to find me and saw through to my wheel
    She said you're now on the bottom, it's either that or the top
    You can keep yourself tiny and bang on the big door
    Or take the space saved for the queen of the hop
    But you know queens have their problems too, and my size won't stay static
    I like to think I never was one for the hoop anyway
    And then that night I dreamed again of the far side of nothing
    And trembling with terror I chose to come back this way.

    In the streets or the 'after,' in the churches or in memory,
    The light that will guide you is the source of the flame
    While stumbling the back alleys in search of right action
    I fell and wept darkly and acknowledged your name
    And the door to my prison dissolved right before me
    But like a young fool I quick looked for a power to claim
    And my wailing increased with the shock of the knowledge
    That I often have needed something out there to blame.

    I give up my fisted touch, my thoughts strong like fences
    My totem-pole stature, body chipped to the bone
    I'm nobody's saviour, and nobody's mine either
    I hear the desert wind whisper "But neither are we alone."
    Sure I long to ask how you're doing, if you got to the lightness
    That you wanted so fiercely when we drifted that way
    There's no telephones ringing now, but I feel something calling me
    And I'm ready to go, I just need time to say
    Hearts are like meadows, with their weathered potential
    With their reasons diluted by reason itself
    I may be shivering at the foot of this slow-giving mountain
    But the tiny spring flowers can look just like you
    And I won't ask the purpose of all of my footsteps
    And I won't let my eyelids cast down
    I am looking for something outside of forgiveness
    You might call it the jewel of the crown.

    Copyright © 1984 Nemesis Publishing, All Rights Reserved


    Marco Giunco
    Work Basket Music Words