I Sliced Pastrami For the CIA and Found God - Sherwood Ross

    I ran a kosher dell
    Down old Virginia way
    Not far from the Pentagon
    And the CIA
    An Admiral got heartburn
    Two generals passed away
    That's when my country called on me
    To trick for the U.S.A.

    Oh, I was whisked to Langley
    In a foreign service car
    Asked to go to Cuba
    Set up my deli bar
    "Irving, slice the same pastrami
    You fix here every day
    let's hope Big Enchilada
    Is gonna come your way."

    Oh, I sliced pastrami for the CIA
    The CIA
    The CIA
    It was Fidel deedle deedle deedle dee all day
    Down old Havana way.

    Armed with Just a butcher knife
    And a roll of Cuban bills
    They flew me In a southeast line
    They dropped me In some hills
    I floated to Havana
    And I am proud to say
    I set up a little deli
    Hoping he'd drop in someday.

    One day soon It happened
    In the afternoon lunch crowd
    This bearded man he entered
    So arrogant and proud
    "I hear you got pastrami
    That could give the devil fright
    Don't be chintzy with the mustard
    let's see If they are right."

    Now I knew he was a tough guy
    The Mafia missed Its turn
    But where they failed with poison
    I'd nail him with heartburn
    They could not make his beard fallout
    So that he'd look less virile
    Boldly I sliced a double one
    I'd freeze his Cuban smile.

    [Repeat Chorus]

    Well, Fidel took one bite from it
    His sunbrowned face turned white
    He began to choke and gasp
    But asked for another bite
    Just then the sky split open
    A voice cried loud and shrill:
    "Irving take back that pastrami
    I said Thou Shalt Not Kill"

    Fidel, he got angry
    But I was out of reach
    Miraculous this hand comes down
    I'm flown half price to Miami Beach
    Now I'm back at my old dell
    And somehow very proud
    I sliced pastrami for the CIA
    And that's how I found God!

    [Repeat Chorus]


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