I struck a match against the door
Of Anthony's Bar and Grill
I was the whining stranger
A fool in love
With time to kill

I've got detectives on his case
They filmed the whole charade
[My rival - show me my rival]
He's got a scar across his face
He wears a hearing aid

Sure he's a jolly roger
Until he answers for his crime
Yes I'll match him whim for whim now

I still recall when I first held
Your tiny hand in mine
[My rival - show me my rival]
I loved you more than I can tell
But now it's stomping time

Sure he's a jolly roger
Until he answers for his crime
Yes I'll match him whim for whim now