I really do appreciate the fact you're sittin' here
Your voice sounds so wonderful
But yer face don't look too clear
Bar maid bring a pitcher, another round o' brew
"Alright let's here it"
Why (don't we get drunk and screw)
"You're on the record!"

Chorus:
Why don't we get drunk and screw
I just bought a water bed, it's filled up for me and you
They say you are a snuff queen
Honey I don't think that's true
So, why don't we get drunk and screw.

"I can't wait for 'em to put that label on my live album. You're sounding absolutely wonderful out there, but we have invited the all girls choir from Lima, Ohio down here and we can't here them too well now. We'd like all of you gentlemen out in the audience to just sorta take a break, sit back and let's let these beautiful women of the Nineties tell us how they feel about it. Ladies are you ready? On the count of four. One, two, three, four."

Chorus:
Why (don't we get drunk and screw)
"Whoo yeah!"
I just bought a waterbed it's filled up with Elmer's glue."
They say you are a snuff queen
Let's see what all you macho men can do
Why (don't we get drunk and screw)
"Oh yeah."
Why don't we get drunk and screw
"I think we better work this out amongst ourselves."
Why don't we get drunk and screw, oooh yeah